I Like Pina Coladas And Pretending To Be Sane

(Jimmy Buffett & Rupert Holmes knew what they were talking about.  I just figured out how to make mixed drinks with my NutriBullet so I think it’s safe to say I’m getting my life together.)

Hello, my darlings.  It’s been a long time.  I’ve longed to feel your sweet caress against my parietal lobe.  Or whatever part of your brain can see blog notifications.  Once again, the world has taken me hostage with homework (avoiding it), bleakness on the news, and the fact that I JUST discovered “vlogging”.

It’s blogging, but with videos.  (Otherwise known as crack.)

Ghost Hunting Shane Dawson Psychic Twins Youtube Vlog
Shane Dawson is currently my favorite, as well as anything with ghosts.

Supposedly, vlogging has been around for over a decade but as far as I’m concerned, it’s the new hip thang yo.  Sure, I used Youtube for listening to music, but I had absolutely no idea there was so much awesome stuff out there.

Ghost hunters, conspiracy theory videos (my long lost love), and people reacting to things… it’s like I was in an internet-coma and finally woke up.  It’s actually making me consider making my own “vlog” but I’m not totally sure how to do that and I don’t know if anybody would bother watching because my life is terribly boring.

I could vlog about the ghosts in my attic?  Although they’re not too talkative these days.  My hope is that they’ve moved on to heaven or whatever but it’s more likely they’ve decided to haunt more interesting/less-talkative type people.

(Perhaps my Burmese nextdoor neighbors?  A nice spooking with the added benefit of being introduced to a different and fascinating culture.  Good for you, ghosts.  Eat, Pray, Love and all that.)

real ghost gif sheet lol

The other reason I’ve been absent is because school.  It’s trying to kill me but I remain strong.  Plus I’ve been getting involved with people and things which is completely out of character for me.

For example, one night I had rum and pina colada mix and my Nutribullet was like, “Hey there pretty lady, ya know you can add those ingredients to me with ice and have a party,” and I was like, “OMG WHY HAVEN’T I THOUGHT OF THIS BEFORE?!?!?!”  And my Nutribullet said, “Because you’re not the sharpest blade in the blender,” and I was like, “Good one, Nutribullet.”  So I took the advice of a household appliance and got pretty tipsy on some delicious iced cocktails.

Then I was all pissed cause Alessandro was watching Fox News and the world is getting on my nerves with political nonsense so I thought to myself (out loud), “Why don’t I write a letter to people and tell them to shut up because they’re being annoying?” and Alessandro was like, “You should do that,” but I wasn’t talking to him so I said, “I wasn’t talking to you,” and set to work on writing a rum-and-stupidity-fueled piece to Thought Catalog (which I had no idea that they’d publish because I mean come on, but they did).

Alanna Open Letter To Millennials Thought Catalog

Anyways, I made the mistake of assuming nobody in my real life pays attention to me or what I do on social media so I posted the link on my actual Facebook page.  Somehow, people saw it and then started seeing links to my blog and my instagram and twitter for my blog, and now everyone(ish) I’ve ever known since high school found me and is following my stuff.

“Why is that bad?” you might ask.  Well, if you’ve been following me or know my writing even a little bit, you know my candor vis-a-vis the people I know in real life and how I say terrible things about them as well as revealing many secrets about myself.  So whether it’s libel or slander or just being a dick (because what I say is true so technically it’s not libellous), I’m gonna piss a lot of people off.

Have you guys ever posted something you’ve later come to regret?  Or have stories of family and friends kill you for what you write?

Tell me about it in the comments.  Or come to my house and chat because that’s how easy it is to find me now.

Published by

White Girls Be Like

Hey there, I'm Alanna. I can't give you my last name for legal reasons, but you probably won't pronounce it right anyway. This is a blog about various occurrences in my life and also some of my thoughts and feelings about things, otherwise known as "what white girls be like". It's true. We be like... "Cats, Lana del Rey, Coors Light, and Twitter". If you disagree, please comment and tell me to shut up. Otherwise, enjoy! :)

9 thoughts on “I Like Pina Coladas And Pretending To Be Sane”

  1. Ahhhh I’ve missed you! And yes, there have been times I posted something and been like, “….crap.” Buttttt I read from another blogger who had a “fuck it” mentality and there will always be at least one person out there who agrees with you! Haha

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hey stranger–it was nice to get a notification of a new post! Fortunately all my judgmental family members know nothing about my blog so I’m able to write whatever I want. It’s pretty awesome. Anyway, is sucks that you’ve been “outted” but hey, that means higher reader stats, so that’s good, right?

    Liked by 1 person

  3. My Mom stopped reading my blog when it got too personal–she didn’t want to know that much about my life. I can’t blame her. I blog much differently than I did back when she decided that, and some of the stuff I wrote then would never see the light of day on any social media platform EVER these days.

    But you live and you learn…ay?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s a good practice. I tell my mom not to read but she’s like me and would rather creep and be horrified than let the truth lie or whatever. She actually thinks this is funny but only because she has zero attention span and only reads like 2 posts at a time when she feels like it which is rare. The real fear is other people I know in real life other than family


  4. Yes, I creeped ALL THE WAY BACK HERE to spring post, lol.

    I’m having a similar problem, as in some of my family knew about my blog when I originally started, but have forgotten about it and don’t know i’s active again. Not sure if I want that, OR some of my Facebook friends being obnoxious on here possibly. But networking is so crucial, and sharing a link might be good for me. I’ve really been debating this for the last month, I wish I’d have already accidently ousted myself from internet anonymity.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha yess it warms my heart that you creeped <3 You're freaking hilarious, I'm obsessed with your blog haha. But yeah, it's a struggle deciding whether to be anonymous or not. Being officially open now here has been good and bad, on one hand I reach more people and feel better being honest but on the other hand this blog comes up when potential employers type in my name so I've had trouble getting a job and I have to limit the stuff I write about now because when I used to write about people in my real life, nobody would see and it was okay, but now I can't even change their names cuz I'll get crap. In fact, someone that I wrote about in 2014 crept all the way back to a post where I mention him in like one stupid paragraph and messaged me a million-word thing on instagram about it. I should have known because he was exactly the type of person to do something like that but still. It was weird and taught me a lesson about what I can write about.


  5. I love your blog too! I laugh pretty much all the GD time on here hahahah. xD I’m really glad you enjoy mine, I’ve ben frustrated at it lately because I have too much stuff going on and so my poor blog is lagging, lol. Oh man I have friends who would creep way back and do the same thing too. I think I have most of tem set up on my FB where they can’t see my posts, but you never know! And I don’t think I’ll block it if someone ELSE posts the link. The job part was definitely something I was concerned about and considered, so I used a name I’m known for using online instead of my real one, so potential employers won’t easily link it. I think a couple of my family members like my dad would recognize the name since hey see me use that handle cause they’re online a lot, but I’m not generally worried about them.

    Liked by 1 person


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