Awards, Just Your Everyday Neighborhood Nonsense, Lists, Who Is Alanna?

Sisterhood Of The World Bloggers Award

(Because people actually read my nonsense and everyone is awesome. I love you all.)

Thank you so much Not Another Tall Blog for nominating me for this award! I’m so grateful <3 She’s awesome and funny so check her out!!

Sisterhood of the World Bloggers Award

Here are the five rules to follow:

1. Thank the blogger who nominated you, linking back to their site.

2. Put the Award logo on your blog.

3. Answer the ten questions sent to you.

4. Make up ten new questions for your nominees to answer.

5. Nominate seven blogs.

My Answers:

1. How long have you been blogging for?

Since this past August. Almost 6 months I guess… (You can read my first-ever post here.)

2. As trivial as this may sound, why do you blog?

Because talking to myself was getting weird and unfulfilling haha. But also because I wanted to for a while and my dad said I’d never do it, so I was all, “Fuck you, I’m totally doing it.” And now here we are.

3. Is there anything in particular that you would like to achieve with your blog?

Maybe some networking and hopefully more people reading it. But mostly just being able to write somewhere other than my journal and making new friends which has been probably the best part of this whole experience.

4. Do you “do” blogger awards? If yes, what do they mean to you? If not, why not?

I did one before (read it here), and I keep getting nominated for another one but I haven’t written the post yet because I’m a terrible procrastinator. But I think awards are really awesome and a great way to support each other in the blogging world. It’s always nice to get praise or recognition for your work, and even if it’s small, it feels good to know someone likes what you’re doing. I’m always grateful for the nominations. :)

5. Is there anything that your followers don’t know about you, which you would really like them to know?

I’m not sure if there’s anything they don’t know about me (that I’d want to share). Maybe only that they’re awesome and I truly appreciate every follow, like, and comment. Even if I don’t always respond or if I don’t post for a while, I appreciate all of you guys and I’m glad you’ve stuck around for all my bullshit. <3

6. What does the “sisterhood” cause mean to you?

Well, my mind immediately jumps to traveling pants, but I’d say a group of badass ladies who support each other. Solidarity and feminism an all that. Lol.

7. Can you share with other bloggers a good practice that works well for you (e.g., a “tip”)?

I think the best thing is networking any way you can. Twitter, Facebook, whatever. Anything that will get out your site and allow you to interact with other bloggers. That’s important, too. You’ve gotta communicate with your readers.

8. Is there anything that you are particularly proud of as a blogger?

Probably getting interviewed on Opticynicism. That was a fun experience and they’re cool people.

9. Do you tend to read other blogs, or do you prefer to concentrate just on maintaining yours?

I try to read as many as possible and always try to check out my followers to see what they’re writing. It sucks because I don’t always have the time to do it or to read all the people I want but if I have the time, I’ll read as many as I can.

10. Does blogging require any sacrifices from you?

Maybe a little bit of my time but it’s not really a sacrifice. I love doing this and I’d totally do it all day if I could. I wish I could share my blog with more people I know in real life, but I don’t want to offend anyone or let my grandmom see my terrible cursing haha.

My Questions For The Nominees:

1. How you feeling today? What’s new in your life?

2. What’s your favorite thing to write/blog about?

3. Is there anything you wish you could write about but you can’t because of propriety or other stuff like that?

4. What’s your “life’s dream”? Like, if you could achieve or do ANYTHING in the world, what would it be?

5. What would you want to achieve with your blog, if anything?

6. Why did you start blogging in the first place?

7. Have you ever been in love? If so, tell your story. If not, describe your perfect love-scenario.

8. What are some of your favorite posts of all time?

9. What’s your favorite and least favorite thing about blogging?

10. What made you want to write? (And by that I mean any type of writing, not just blogging or whatever.)

Nominees:

1. Endearingly Wacko

2. Jessie Reyna

3. Angst Anarchy

4. Refractory Ramblings From the Dark Side

5. Shit Denise Says

6. Alice at Wonderland

7. Properly Ridiculous

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Awards, Reblogging Baby

Check Out Endearingly Wacko And Laugh Your Pants Off!

(Thank you to Gina at Endearingly Wacko for the Funny Blog Friday contest award!! I’m totally gonna prank everybody. Here’s a bit from her latest blog post so go read it and get some LOL’s.)

The time I found a human skull on the balcony

“A few days ago I received an email from a friend that said this:
“We found this next to the Goodwill box at the cardboard recycling center. We looked inside and surprisingly, it did not contain a human head.”
First off, I have to say that I love it that I have friends who will send me messages like this. I opened this email on my phone and there was no photo attached to it. I was like, “Nooooooooooooo!”. How could such an awesome lead-in be missing the punchline? I checked my desktop computer and was relieved to be able to see the photo. Here it is:”

Read the rest here…

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Awards, Funny Blog Friday, My Boyfriend Has A Mustache

Funny Blog Friday!! #FBF

(I know you’re all just dying to see who won the “Guest Post Contest”, but you’ll have to scroll down for that. Also, if you stay around long enough to read this post, there’s another giveaway to be had. Stay tuned…)

Hellooo and welcome to the first annual (or rather, weekly) Funny Blog Friday!!! Hashtag “FBF”. Hashtag “badass”. Hashtag “laugh your hash off”. This Blog Hop consists of pretty much the greatest people on earth. You should all go visit their blogs because they’re amazing and that’s kind of the whole point of this.

And to make you laugh.

And they’re giving away prizes, too. Get it while it’s hot, y’all.

Funny Bloggers:

Victoria of Angst Anarchy

Jamie of Fits of Wit

H.E. Ellis of H.E. Ellis 

Jessie of Jessie Reyna & Jessie Janelle Reyna

Alice of Alice at Wonderland

Ben of Ben’s Bitter Blog

Jenn of Properly Ridiculous

Lisa of Buddhaful Britt

JC of JCS Bloggery

Sarah of No Cry Babies

Elke of The Pretty Platform

Jack of The Things I see Up Here

Chicks A & E of Too Funny Chicks

Charly of Crazy Life

Kevin of Trailer Trash Deluxe

Karilin of That Nameless Color

Arthur from Pouring My Art Out

Go to these people’s blogs, do what they tell you to do (they’re calling from inside the house), and get free shit because this is America (depending where you’re standing) and in this country we give people prizes for existing. Seriously, it’s not that hard. In fact, I have yet another giveaway today for anyone who follows the rules on this link:

I’M GIVING AWAY MORE GIFT CARDS SO CLICK THIS RIGHT NOW.

Oh, and by the way…

HAPPY HALLOWEEN, MOTHA FUCKAASS!!!

Aren’t you hyped? Because if not, you should be. Halloween is awesome; candy, costumes, dickheaded teenagers running around in black hoodies and making fun of us for being adults… I love this holiday. Also, I might be in my local paper in the coming days because last night was Trick-or-Treat night in my town and some reporter took some pictures of me in my all-out Bride of Frankenstein gear.

Or he may have just been a pervert. Either way, I’m calling it a win.

This is Alessandro and I as Dr. Frankenstein and his wife. Note how the black and white really brings out the antique effect, despite the fact we're using a webcam...

This is Alessandro and I as Dr. Frankenstein and his bride. Note how the black and white really brings out the antique effect, despite the fact we’re using a webcam…

I also tried to recreate the original movie picture, but then I realized my large nose just would not have that. It longs to be heard.

I also tried to recreate the original movie picture, but then I realized my large nose just would not have that. It longs to be heard.

And these were my oh-so-classy stripper shoes that make me 6 feet tall (we measured for accuracy). They're super fun to walk in, too...

And these were my oh-so-classy stripper shoes that make me 6 feet tall (we measured for accuracy). They’re super fun to walk in, too…

I don’t know how many of you are 6 feet tall and above, but fun fact: it fucking rocks. You totally get to tower over everybody and feel like an Amazon queen. (Or Amazon king if you’re a guy… but perhaps not because I’m not sure Amazonian kings existed. But then I always wonder what happened to baby boys born to Amazon women. Do they just do that Spartan thing where they’d throw them off a cliff? Or do they get sent away to Amazonian boarding school because nobody in Amazon-Land wants to raise a male? Also, who impregnates these women? Is there a tribe of super-men who come around every year to bust a nut in some tall warrior ladies? So many questions…)

Anyways, I digress. Another fun fact: without my wig, I totally look like the Joker. Imagine all this makeup with bright red hair.

My face doesn't just look white. I'm caked in WHITE ASS MAKEUP. Like white. I can't stress that enough.

My face doesn’t just look white. I’m caked in WHITE ASS MAKEUP. Like white. I can’t stress that enough.

It was really fun putting all this crap on my face and especially drawing the scars. I used those cheap Party City costume makeup crayons and it still stinks like wax up in this place. Some little kids didn’t wanna come up to my porch because they were scared of me. But that’s okay because apparently, parents don’t teach their children to say “Thank you” anymore so kids just give me a “Fuck-You-Where’s-My-Candy”-stare and hold out their tiny little hands. Then I’m expected to compliment their shitty costumes, give them candy, and tell them they’re cute and to have a “Happy Halloween” just because I’m an adult?!? Well, fuck that noise. Your kids can get razor-blade chocolate for all I care. I don’t give people compliments unless I truly mean them and, quite frankly, their costumes are lame. I wasn’t even drinking last night (at least not a lot), and I still managed to smile at tiny jerkoffs who thought that I was a witch or Morticia Addams. Just because the real Bride of Frankenstein wig was too small for my gangster-size head (that’s an “8” in fitted caps for those of you who don’t know) and I had to reappropriate an Amy Winehouse wig (which I did fantastically), doesn’t mean you’re allowed to be stupid. I will say that wigs are incredibly fun, however.

(I secretly wanna go around wearing different colored wigs, pretending to be someone else. People will be like, “Alanna? Is that you?” and I’ll reply, “I have no idea who you’re talking about, my name is Avada Cadabra. Good day.” And just walk off into the sunset.)

Oh, by the way, why did nobody tell me there are zillions of makeup tutorial videos on YouTube??! All this time, I’m walking around looking like a person who taught herself how to apply makeup (which I did), practically looking like Janis Joplin, wondering why all these other girls came to class or the store or the fucking laundromat with professional-looking makeup. All these years feeling bad about myself for not looking like the girls on PLL when in fact it’s really super easy and all you have to do is watch some random girl put on makeup while she videotapes herself!!!

I blame you all for my ignorance.

But I forgive you because now it’s time to announce the winner of my “Guest Post Competition”…

(Hello, drumroll?)

(Also, this isn’t the winner of the other giveaway, just the one you should know about if you’ve been reading my blog the past week.)

…..

..

.

(Pissed yet?)

.

Well, let me preface this by saying that it was really difficult to pick a winner because everyone’s posts were excellent and funny and different. I thought about giving out more gift cards on multiple occasions, but unfortunately, I’m not rich like that. I’m sorry to those of you who submitted but didn’t win. Remember you can still win a gift card by doing today’s giveaway. You’re all still amazing, but just like the Highlander, there can only be one.

The only problem is that (unlike today’s contest), I chose the winner myself and of course personal biases came into play. I tried to make a pro’s and con’s list. Without divulging what are “pro’s” and what are “con’s”, my lists included such gems as “‘Billy Madison’ reference”, or “My personal opinion possibly skewed by obvious attraction to writer”, or “Poop jokes :)”.

So, basically, after long and careful deliberation, Underdaddy is the winner with his post entitled “Tampon Anonymous“.

Congratulations!

Please be sure to read and visit the blogs of everyone who posted (there’s only 10 so it’s not that hard), and give them your love. They all deserve it for being awesome and as far as I’m concerned, they’re all on my list of funny people. They totally deserve some snaps.

For anyone else who wants to win stuff too, comment here and you’ll be automatically in the running for another $25 gift certificate to the place of your choosing (at least from this list). So comment, people!! And visit the folks for “Funny Blog Friday”!! Happy Halloween, everybody!! And have a very funny Friday! :)

MUNSTERRS

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Awards, Funny Blog Friday, LEND ME YOUR GUEST POSTS!, Reblogging Baby

Tampon Anonymous

THE WINNER OF THE FUNNY BLOG FRIDAY (#FBF) GUEST POST CONTEST!!!
“Some suggestions for Feminine Hygiene companies”

Underdaddy

Sometimes having a heart to heart is really tough. However, with some honest dialogue there is room for growth. That being said… Pull up a chair and lets have a little chat. I would like to talk about something in your pants that every so often involves a man in your life.

You see the problem almost always starts out like this:

Supermom: Hey honey! Are you stopping by the store on the way home?

Me: Yeah I was going to pickup a case of Old Spice, some wood screws, and some beer.

Supermom: Great! I am trying to not stab the dog and cry randomly in front of the kids so I need you to get something for me while you are there.

Me: No problem sweetums. What do you need? (I think I know at this point)

Supermom: I’m feeling a little crampy and I think I am…

View original post 1,380 more words

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Awards, Lists, Who Is Alanna?

You Guys Are Lovely, And I Love You All.

(Seriously. You’re amazing. I’d kiss every one of you if I could “Blue Skadoo” into the internet. Get to work, science.)

So, I was nominated for the One Lovely Blog Award by 3 amazing people: Fits of Wit, Refractory Ramblings From The Darkside, and Serpentine is Here. Follow them now. Like, right now. Don’t make me come to your house and kill you. (Just kidding. You know I love you. Just to be safe, though…)

They’re all wonderful and very different blogs, but they share one common thing: they like me. As far as I’m concerned, that makes you a hero. Seriously though, they’re all great writers and fascinating people who make me laugh, cry, or just see life from a whole new perspective.

I’m relatively new to the blogging game, but everyone has been so awesome and welcoming. You guys have no idea how your words touch me and brighten my day. I really am grateful to have found like-minded people here who wanna talk, give me advice, or just say “hey”. Thank you all for your kind, inspiring, and hilarious words, and thank you for reading this. If you ever meet me in real life and need anything, I’m totally here for you. Thanks again to my wonderful nominators (Fits of Wit, Refractory Ramblings From The Darkside, and Serpentine is Here)!! You guys are amazing <3

one_lovely_blog_award

Here Are The Rules:

1. You must thank the person who nominated you and include a link to their blog.

2. You must list the rules.

3. You must add 7 facts about yourself.

4. You must nominate 15 other bloggers and comment on one of their posts to let them know they have been nominated.

5. You must display the award logo and follow the blogger who nominated you.

7 Facts About Me:

1. My hair is so long that I have to tie it up to go to the bathroom.

2. I’ve only been to 4 different states outside Pennsylvania (where I live): Maryland, Virginia, New Jersey, and Delaware (also technically New York, but only because I went to New York City for the day which I don’t actually count).

3. I’ve been keeping journals since I was about 6 years old, but one time in 8th grade, I had this crazy freak-out renaissance-thing where I burned all my old journals in a glorious blaze and was re-born from the ashes. (I thought that if I started writing more like an adult who had their shit together, my life would follow suit. I was wrong… I pretty much went back to nonsense after a few months.)

4. I was engaged when I was 18 years old because teenagers are really smart…

5. My entire family is from South Jersey, right outside of Philadelphia, and my parents were both one of 6 children so my family is huge. I feel bad because I don’t go to see them even close to as much as I should, but only because I hate driving for that long. (Not even a good excuse.)

6. I was recently(ish) diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. I don’t totally understand it yet, but it scares the Hell out of me.

7. I might be an alcoholic (you’ve probably noticed), but I prefer the term “alcohol enthusiast” because I’m not ready to deal with it yet. Lol.

Here are the blogs I’m nominating. I follow so many amazing blogs, and I’d love to nominate so many of them, but these are just some of my favorites, my friends, or some that I really enjoy. If you nominated me, you won’t be on here, but you totally would be if you hadn’t hit me up first. :)

Nominees:

Angst Anarchy

Jessie Reyna

The Real VD

F.A.G.

So, I Read This Book Today

Weddings & Wanderlust

Ben’s Bitter Blog

See, there’s this thing called biology…

Abby Has Issues

meganelizabethmorales

The Truth Shall Set You Free So Don’t Be A Crybaby

Too Funny Chicks

lulufille

Writing Seventeen

takingthemaskoff

Well, that’s it for me now. I’ll post again either tonight or sometime this weekend. Thanks again, everybody!! I love you all <3

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