Shutupshutupshutup.

(Also, shut up.  Everybody’s got an opinion, and frankly, I don’t care about them.  Except you guys’ opinions.  Because you matter and aren’t assholes.)

Pretty much everybody in my life are being dicks recently and I’ve been daydreaming about buying them all plane tickets to some remote island with a badass 5-star resort (all-expenses-paid-type-deal) but then tell the pilot to drop them all off and leave them there and then they find out there’s no resort or actual phones or internet or boats and they just have to all be together with their dickishness.

Penis Island
This is what I imagine it would look like.

Then, after a suitable amount of time to suffer my wrath and my irony, they would be allowed to come back and never criticize me again because of my epic superpowers and leader-of-the-world-ness which I plan to gain via Faustian bargain.

This plan is foolproof.

So who would you send to Penis Island and why?  Also, should this be a real place?  (I think it is actually.)  Let me know in the comments about the dicks in your life.  Love y’all :)

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